Who Left Their Dirty Socks In The Fanatic Office?
The things we deal with in a shared workspace. For the past couple of months, there has been a pair of dirty socks sitting next to one of the bullpen desks we use to prepare for our shows. Someone not only took their socks off, and placed them in the desk area. But they have left them there unclaimed for months now. And since no one want’s to touch someone else’s dirty laundry, that is where they have stayed.
I do not quite remember when the socks showed up. They were definitely there during the Phillies’ playoff run. But they have been sitting there long enough. Every day we all walk into the office and sit at those computers, but the socks are never moved. We collectively ignore their presence. And the culprit, whoever he or she is, has refused to come forward and claim them. We all just hoped that whoever owns the socks would silently collect them. But that never happened. And it has gone on long enough.
So who is the culprit? It could be anyone. Did Connor Thomas decide to go sockless one day the way he likes to occasionally drive around shirtless? Tyler Zulli is no longer in the office every night. Was it him and he just hasn’t been here to claim his socks? Or maybe it was me, and I am only writing this article to deflect blame from myself. I was the stapler breaker, so I have a record that makes me a prime suspect. Who knows. Everyone is a suspect. No single person at this station can be ruled out yet. But something needs to be done. Someone needs to come forward and remove their socks from the desk area.
They could even do so silently. It doesn’t need to be a whole thing. A year ago when it was the mystery of the broken stapler, I silently replaced the stapler I broke with a new one. It eventually came out that it was me anyway (even if some people to this day claim I was just the fall guy). But someone could just pick up their socks, and we may never know who it was.
The socks cannot remain though. Like George Constanza once said, “we are living in a society.” We can’t just go leaving our socks everywhere willy-nilly. There are rules and standards. The world would be madness if people just left their socks wherever they wanted with no consequence. So whoever the culprit is, please claim your dirty socks.
Until then, who is your lead suspect? Who at the Fanatic would just leave dirty socks laying around the office this long?
